Seven Children’s Picture Books that Tackle Big Feelings

Welcome to So Many Thoughts, a semi-weekly newsletter about royal style and the other parts of life I want to think through with you. You can subscribe here and follow me on Instagram at @EHolmes. Thank you!

Hi, how are you? This weekend I worked on a jigsaw puzzle that my older sister, Emily, sent me for my birthday. I have loved puzzles for as long as I can remember and was thrilled when my kids were old enough to be interested in them, too. But I haven’t started a puzzle with more than 100 pieces since becoming a mom. At the start of the pandemic, when puzzles surged in popularity, I looked longingly at the social media posts of people documenting their progress.

Couldn’t be me, I thought. Where would I put it? Plus, there are beds to make, laundry to fold, dishes to do…

Well, Emily must have known I needed it. When I unwrapped the 500-piece puzzle she sent me, my kids went wild. Four-year-old Oliver asked when we could break it open. “This weekend!” I said to pacify him. But the minute Friday rolled around, you better believe my dude remembered. So we opened it Saturday morning and spread it out over our dining room table.

We began working on the puzzle as a family, cheering when we completed the border. My oldest and youngest, Fitzgerald and Eleanor, lost interest in the rest pretty quickly. But Oliver sat on my lap, chatting and fumbling with the tiny pieces for long stretches. I drifted in and out of the puzzle all weekend. If Oliver was awake when I began working, he would find me and settle in for another session. Nobody seemed to mind that we ate all of our meals at our kitchen counter so as not to disturb the pieces.

It sounds silly, but this puzzle made me so happy — and felt like a big step in my quest to re-think rest this year. Because you know what you can’t do when you are doing a puzzle? Fold laundry. Or stare at a screen. The puzzle reminded me to relax and enjoy the journey. I haven’t finished it yet, mostly because I don’t want it to be over. 10/10 recommend.

Another salve for these challenging times, especially with kiddos: Picture books. Below, a few titles about big feelings that we really love and are helping us through this COVID surge.

And finally, five links for you. Take care, friends. xx

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To be honest, I often reach my limit when it comes to playing with my kids. But I am always, always up for reading to them. We cozy up in a chair or on one of their beds, my lap overflowing with a tangle of limbs and stuffies. Right now we are in a sweet spot with my kids’ ages (two, four, and six); they can all sit through the same stories. It’s magical.

Nearly seven years into parenthood, our home library has expanded from a single basket of books to filling shelves throughout our house. I treasure these titles, especially the ones that have helped guide us through these challenging times. When Oliver was sick with COVID, we returned to some of our favorites to help us explain — or start a conversation about — some big, hard feelings. I wanted to share a few books with you in case it’s helpful for your little ones. You can tell by the crinkled pages and dog-eared corners in the pictures below that we read these repeatedly.

NOTE: Please look for these books at your library or your local independent bookstore. For reference purposes, I’ve included Amazon links below.

FEAR: The Lion Inside written by Rachel Bright, illustrated by Jim Field

My dear friend India Winslow, a talented librarian who now lives in London, sent us this lyrical tale about a mouse who is determined to roar. I’ve since bought all of the books by this illustrator-writer duo, each based on a different animal tackling a new challenge. They are wonderful! But “The Lion” Inside remains our favorite for its “both” philosophy.

SADNESS: The Rabbit Listened, written and illustrated by Cori Doerrfeld

My younger sister, Carolyn, sent us this book at the start of the pandemic. She found it through Dolly Parton’s incredible book program, Imagination Library. When I tell you I get chills every time! “The Rabbit Listened” is so tender, following Taylor coping with the disappointment of a knocked-down tower. (I also adore how Taylor is not gendered; So many children’s books assign gender when there is no need to bring gender into the topics at hand.)

WORRY: Ruby Finds a Worry, written and illustrated by Tom Percival

I ordered this title just as our oldest was starting virtual kindergarten in 2020. He is not a natural worrier — though his mama sure is! — but I noticed a bit of nervousness as the school year got underway. “Ruby Finds a Worry” helped us both. It tells the story of a worry that looms larger and larger over dear Ruby, and how she learns to manage it.

FEELING LIKE YOU DON’T BELONG: The Day You Begin, written by Jaqueline Woodson, illustrated by Rafael López.

Between the pandemic, and our move, and this stage of parenthood, I feel like I’m constantly putting my kids in new social settings. “The Day You Begin” walks through so many ways a child might feel like an outsider: “Maybe it will be your skin, your clothes, or the curl of your hair.” It reminds us that we are all unique and connected, too.

NERVOUSNESS: Jabari Jumps, written and illustrated by Gaia Cornwall

I have all of you to thank for this one! So many of you recommended it in the comments of an Instagram post. This one really resonates with my two boys. Jabari goes to the swimming pool with his dad and sister, and works up the courage to jump off the diving board.

FEELING NOT GOOD ENOUGH: The Pout Pout Fish Goes to School, written by Deobrah Diesen, illustrated by Dan Hanna

This series, about a fish with a frown, is a contemporary classic. I love them! I order a new one every time it comes out. But my favorite might be this throwback tale of when Mr. Fish starts school — and flounders — until a teacher steers him back.

LOSS: Maybe Tomorrow, written by Charlotte Agell, illustrated by Ana Ramírez González

We picked up “Maybe Tomorrow” at the library years ago because I was enchanted by the illustrations — and Matt was so touched by the story that he bought a copy for our home. This book is a tear-jerker, whether you have lost a loved one or are dealing with another kind of sadness. Elba the hippopotamus is weighed down by a big black block, which we learn signifies her grief. Talking about it with her new friend Norris the alligator helps lighten the load.

What children’s books about big feelings do you love? Please hit “Join the discussion” and add your favorites in the comments of this newsletter.

Note: I use affiliate links, which means that if you make a purchase I may get a small commission at no cost to you. Thank you for supporting my work.

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I’ll see you back in your inboxes on Friday with a royal deep dive.

Thanks to Kelli, who commented on Instagram: “I’ve been really enjoying the last two Friday SMTs that are more long form and about a single topic!” (ie Kate’s fashion and the allegations against Andrew). I really appreciated that feedback; as a writer, it’s been satisfying, too.

Do you have thoughts on the SMT Newsletter? Topics you would like to see me cover or formats you prefer? Send me an email at Hello@SoManyThoughts.com.

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